2. After seeing S-21 and The Killing Fields, your moto driver will ask if you want to go to the shooting range. It's okay to say no.
3. Being constantly covered in a full layer of grime is the great equalizer among travellers.
4. The ubiquitous "Same Same But Different" slogan on t-shirts applies to everything...from guesthouses to food to ladyboys.
5. The worst bathroom in Canada is shangri-la compared to the nicest one in Laos or Cambodia.
6. Kids in Cambodia know some very colourful language.
7. Canadians have to pay an outrageous amount for a Lao visa.
8. A tuk-tuk driver proposing? Not so uncommon.
9. Menus and signs have hilarious typos.
10. Gorging oneself on Pad Thai is not frowned upon.
11. Estheticians are trained in arm-to-arm combat.
12. Squat toilets should be made illegal.
13. All the backpackers are reading Shantaram.
14. Moto drivers will earnestly offer you a ride, and then whisper almost seductively in your ear "Marijuana??" Laughing and walking away is okay.
15. You will meet genuinely friendly locals who you wish would adopt you.
16. Listening to the Woodstock soundtrack while taking a bus up the coast of Vietnam makes for an entertaining ride.
17. When it rains in Laos, everyone hunkers down in restaurants or bars to watch Friends or Family Guy reruns.
18. When you mention that you're from Canada, people will ask if you know Justin Bieber.
19. If you're sitting at a cafe waiting for breakfast, and you witness the chef chasing a stray dog out of the kitchen, don't be alarmed. Your omelette will probably still be fine.
20. When tuk-tuk drivers in Bangkok start making clicking and popping noises at you, that is their way of inviting you to a ping-pong show. Proceed with caution.
21. Leaving is very, very hard to do.
Questions? Comments? Criticisms? I'd love to hear them all.
the-wanderingjew@hotmail.com
